Ancient Civilization: Akatsuki
by YaoiPhox
Summary: You've heard of the Ancient Egyptians, Greeks, and perhaps Sumerians... But what about the Akatsuki?  Warning: Gender-Bending. I tried to stay as in character as possible. There is good reason for the GB.  A civilization faces many challenges...
1. Introduction

Three figures crossed a desert, ragged and worn but determined. They had been cast from their previous home after being caught stealing. You see, the trio were orphans of an early civilization. Yahiko, their leader and elder brother figure, Nagato, a quiet boy with a heart that yearns for peace, and Konan, the strong mother figure, made up the group. They had left their old village, vowing to form a better, safer civilization. Soon they found a man named Madara whom offered them a place by the Ame River. Yahiko took his deal and led his friends to the river. The man had gone as quickly as he had come but they minded not for they were still fairly young.

Nagato looked up to Yahiko and longed to help him with his goal. His goal was to provide, as mentioned, a safe haven for kids like them. They got to work, gathering various orphans and started to settle. They did not have cattle nor did they have any ability to build elaborate structures such as the Egyptians' pyramids or the Qin's terra cotta army. Yet they managed to survive to their twenties. Then, an awful event took place...

A group of violent nomads had come to their village and gained control. Yahiko died trying to defend what he had built. Konan and Nagato barely had time to weep as they fled with their leader's body. They ran into the Suna deserts once more and collapsed. On that night, Nagato had received a dream. It was one from the gods telling him he was one of them and he would rebuild what Amegakure had destroyed. His eyes became ringed and gray; even Konan had changed, becoming numerous sheets of papyrus. When he awoke, Madara was awaiting the duo and offered the orphans an opportunity.

He told him that now Nagato would be called Pain for that is what he would bring to the people of Amegakure. Madara taught Pain how to summon beasts and that is how he regained control of his village once more. The only problem was that now... there were only two Akatsuki left. Akatsuki is what they had called themselves before Yahiko had met his end. Once they returned to the village, the very first thing they did was bury their friend in a safe and highly honored place. Nearby, Pain constructed a temple and palace with his new-found power. Madara, once more, had left them to fend for themselves with a piece of advice:

Search for those whom seem to have lost all.

* * *

This is very loosely based on what I have learned in my World History class on early civilizations. I meant for this one, as well as a vast majority of my other stories, to be short oneshots but alas; this is a chapter fic once more...

My question to readers/reviewers: (The ones after the first are optional.)

Do you prefer oneshots or chapters? Why? If chapters, roughly how many before you lose interest? How long for each chapter? For the oneshots: What kind; AU, Tragic, Death, Thoughts of a character, short story (which I am incapable of writing xD)?

If there's anything else you feel like explaining, go ahead. You don't have to send your answer in a Private message but it is encouraged. I might put my findings up at the end and thank all that answered. *makes a poll*


	2. Gathering Followers

"Konan, go out and fetch me my first follower. You shall be my angel. I will make six additional bodies, one shall be their leader." Pain explained, summoning his six other bodies.

"Yes, Naga—Pain." She bowed and departed from the temple.

She headed out, out into the sky with wings of papyrus. She followed the Ame River but paused, spotting a familiar-looking man. It was Madara but soon, he had vanished into thin air. Frowning, she landed where he had been. It was then that she heard a cry for help. She looked out into the current, flowing stronger after the night's rainfall, and saw a queer man with blue skin and hair. Curious, she hovered over to him. She was now made of delicate papyrus so could not get too wet so she hesitated to help him out.

Then, one of the six additional Pains arrived. He pulled the blue man from the river but he was unconscious. Together they brought the man back to their village and laid him in the temple before the other five Pains. Nagato's body was hidden behind the doors behind them. He was given back his breath and awoke with a start.

"What is your name and birthplace?" The Pain that had fished him from the river inquired.

"Kisame Hoshigaki from the Kiri River." He replied, his grin revealed shark-sharp teeth.

"You mean Kirigakure?" Konan tilted her head.

"No, I was seriously born in the Kiri river. They say my mom was a river goddess and my father a mere peasant. I was recently banned from Kirigakure for being too brutal in one of their wars." He laughed, "I think they just wanted an excuse to expel the freak." He scoffed. "If mother is the river goddess, she agreed because she didn't flood the river."

"I am sorry." Konan sympathized, bowing her head.

"Well, you have saved me so now I am indebted to you." Kisame cheered.

"You shall join us, the Akatsuki, and make our civilization great." Pain said, "You will tend the river and handle irrigation."

"Yes sir."

Konan led Kisame out of the temple and watched the main Pain head for the palace. She brought Kisame to their river and he soon got to work. She left him after awhile then flew high above the village. So far, only a temple and palace had been constructed. They would need houses but they would need to be placed accordingly. None of them could be too close to the river, for it tended to flood often with the constant rainfall for which it was named for.

The palace and temple would need to be heavily guarded. Their cities would need walls as well to prevent yet another attack before they were ready. She sighed then floated back down. Kisame was strong built so he would be able to assist in building but they also needed a farmer. Something told her Kisame would be a poor choice. She headed back to the temple and spoke with Nagato. He told her of a dream in which a man with green hair and two sides roamed the desert, searching for them. She gave a nod then hurried to search for him.

She spied him below, talking to a cactus as though it could understand. She hesitated before approaching but the man noticed her and turned to her. Half of his body had been charred black while the other was white. His hair was indeed green and he spoke as though there were two of them.

"We have been searching for the Papyrus Angel, Konan. You are her?"

"Are you a farmer?" She returned.

"Why yes, we were. We were good too but another farmer had grown jealous of our wealthy crop and tried to burn us to death. He half succeeded." The man motioned to his burnt side, "We are Zetsu."

"Come with me then. You will be our farmer."

–

Zetsu started to farm the silt from the river but at a decent distance to where he was not at risk of losing his crops to the flood. Kisame had told him the river would only flood so far and he would be sure it would not flood farther than promised. Now the Akatsuki had a farmer and a builder but no doctor. Kisame had fallen ill and lay on the bed of the makeshift shelter for the farmer. That farmer stood nearby, praying. He was not praying to their god, Pain, but to his beloved goddess, Tobi. She was a goddess that represented the sun and happiness from his old village. It was the only god he had believed in aside from Pain.

He fell asleep, praying for his ill friend and then dreamed a marvelous dream. Tobi came to him and touched his shoulder, waking him temporarily outside his body. She took his hand and they headed to Konohagakure—the civilization over the mountains that relied on the trees. A snakelike man rested outside, glaring at the village with clear dislike. Tobi approached this man and whispered in his ear.

"Tobi knows where you can go. There are the Akatsuki, seeking revenge on all whom have deceived them."

The golden-eyed man grinned an ominous grin then stood. He was given the location and soon, Tobi had taken Zetsu to a quiet place. There, she gave him a hug and her heart...

–

Konan awoke early in the morning and went to check on Kisame. She found Zetsu sleeping and started to shake him. He awoke groggily and yawned hugely. When he saw Konan tending to Kisame, he recalled the first half of his dream. He informed Konan of having found a medicinal expert and she brightened. They left Kisame to rest once more and headed to the outskirts of their village. Orochimaru, their new doctor, had come with a woman wearing a terra cotta mask. Zetsu immediately recognized the swirled design—the symbol for Tobi at his previous village.

"I heard you are in need of a medicinal expert?" The snake-like man hissed.

"Yes, yes we are. He is in the farmer's bed. Come." Konan ushered him away, worrying for her adopted child.

"What are you doing here Tobi?" Zetsu asked the woman.

"Tobi wanted to stay with Zetsu. Tobi is no longer a goddess. Tobi's brother, Madara took Tobi's power for loving you."

"We are so sorry, Tobi." Zetsu sighed, wrapping his arms around her.

"Tobi doesn't mind because now Tobi's with Zetsu." She giggled, heading for his temporary hovel.

"Kisame is healed." Orochimaru informed them on his way out.

"That was fast."

"Orochimaru is very good." Tobi nodded, entering the home.

"Hey Zetsu, who's that?" Kisame was awake and Konan had left with Orochimaru.

"This is Tobi."

"Tobi is Zetsu's fiancee."

"Really? That was fast, Zetsu." Kisame chuckled.

"Out." Zetsu sighed in annoyance, ushering his friend out. "Tobi, did you mean that?"

"Mean what?" She tilted her head.

"We're engaged now?"

"We've always been engaged in Tobi's eyes, Zetsu." She laid back on the bed, "You should tend to your crops. They must be lonely."

–

Seven days passed and there had been an increase of shelters but not villagers. Tobi had spent her days cooking and cleaning for her fiance. She would occasionally do chores for the others since they had no other willing woman save Konan. On the eighth night since Tobi had arrived, a woman had stumbled into their village. Tobi looked up from the clothes she was washing in the river and ran to greet the woman. Kisame slapped his forehead as the clothes floated downstream towards him as he searched for usable clay. He snatched them from the waters and went to give them back.

"You made it, Kabuto-chan." Tobi squealed, hugging the silver-haired woman with glasses.

"Can't. Breathe. Woman." She gasped, struggling to free herself.

"**Tobi.**" Zetsu appeared from seemingly nowhere as he usually did, "Release the newcomer before you scare her away. **Where are our clothes?**"

"Wah! Tobi forgot about the laundry." Tobi cried, releasing Kabuto to cling to her lover, "Tobi's a bad girl."

"It's okay, Tobi. I got them." Kisame said, jogging up to give the couple their clothes, "But who is this newcomer?"

"Kabuto... you have found me." Orochimaru had come outside after hearing the commotion and greeted the young woman.

"How could you just leave me, your best nurse, behind like that, Orochimaru?" She pouted.

"I am sorry. Tobi had me leave the village before I could inform you." He sighed, holding her close.

"Tobi's a bad girl." Tobi sniffed, being led away by Zetsu whom replied, "It's not your fault, Tobi. You're a good girl."

"So... Orochimaru... is this your fiancee too?" Kisame joked.

"As a matter of fact..." The doctor mused, glancing at the woman.

"I was a slave that he bought and soon took in his bed." She replied with a deadpan, "He does the same with little boy slaves."

"Oh come now, dear. No need to say such nasty things." He laughed nervously, pulling her to his hut before the slow 'shark' could make sense of what she had said.

–

More days passed and soon they had gathered much clay. They had more than enough for their structures so were at a loss as to what the clay should be used for. None except perhaps Konan had much creative talent. Tobi could only make masks with the clay. They would need to make crafts so that they may have the chance to trade with other settlements. So, Konan went to Nagato and informed him of this dilemma. He told her to go through the Suna desert and into the mountains and search for two different craftspeople. He told her that two men may accompany her this time for her perilous journey.

She chose to go with Zetsu and Kisame. Zetsu was reluctant to leave Tobi and his crops but she had assured him they would be well looked after. Kisame, on the other hand, was worried about going through the desert and into the mountains. He would be so far from his beloved river. He too was reassured that they would travel by a branch of the Ame river. So, after Zetsu had bid his farewell to his fiancee, they departed on their quest. Zetsu would tell them where to find food and water from the plants and Kisame would lead them to the river anytime their way was lost.

They made it into the mountains two days after their departure and rested at a small clearing not too high up. Kisame exhaled, setting down the two buckets of water he had carried since they left the river. Konan, of course, refused hers and spread her papyrus wings. She took to the sky without a word, skimming the ground for any signs of nomads. A flash of red caused her to stop and land. Then, she was surrounded by what appeared to be wooden dolls. She let out a startled scream and sent slips of paper out to inform Zetsu and Kisame.

They arrived just as Konan's attacker appeared from the shadows, his face set in a frown. Kisame growled before charging the man but was stopped by Zetsu. The red haired man looked young and yet wore the expression of a serious adult.

"Why did you attack me?" Konan asked, her voice calm yet demanding.

"Hmph. Rather bossy for a mere woman." The man drawled, "I was wondering why you followed me."

"Did you craft these dolls?" She inquired.

"THEY AREN'T DOLLS! THEY'RE PUPPETS!" He snapped.

"Oh. Sorry... I did not realize the difference... what are puppets?"

"Puppets are like dolls, yes. But they are used by me for battle. I control them with nearly invisible strings of a few various, available materials." He explained coldly, flicking his hand in order to have his 'soldiers' release the bluehaired angel. "Oh, and did I mention I also use any corpses I may come across to make them seem more real? Some of them were alive when I meet them too."

"Are you threatening Konan?" Zetsu and Kisame scowled, taking defensive positions in front of her.

"You are very skilled. Are you Sasori Akasuna of Sunagakure?" She inquired, raising a brow.

"So you are here for me." He smirked, "I am indeed Sasori."

"We wish for you to come and join us, the Akatsuki whom have settled on the Ame river."

"What makes you think that I would be interested in joining?" His brown eyes narrowed.

"Do you really enjoy living such a lonely life out here?" Konan asked quietly.

"I am not alone." He replied.

"You know of the other artist out here?" He nodded then turned.

"She and I are constantly quarreling over our views of art. She annoys me daily but keeps me company."

"If we convince her to accompany us...?" Konan mused.

"Perhaps..." And he was gone.

"Where shall we find this other artisan, Konan?" Kisame wondered as she once more spread her wings.

"The river where there is clay."

She traveled by sky, following Kisame back to the nearest source of water. They found a woman with long blonde hair resting by the river, but she was washing her clothes, not looking for clay. She gave a content sigh then glanced around before pulling off the clothes she had on. Zetsu turned away once he realized it while Kisame blushed, absentmindedly inching closer. The woman began to wade into the water, stopping when her name was called.

"Deidara, you shouldn't bathe in the middle of the day. People might see you." It was Sasori.

"Gah! PERVERT! How many times do I have to tell you to leave me alone, un?" She squeaked, diving under water.

"I'm just trying to warn you. Besides, it's not like I haven't seen you naked before." He scoffed.

"UGH! I hate you so much, un!" She cried, throwing some mud at him which he easily dodged.

Sasori rolled his eyes then noticed Kisame. He glared at the blue man, then started to walk around the small spring to confront him. Deidara's blue eyes followed him in curiosity then they widened as he attacked the other. She told him to stop and back off then threw a quickly-crafted clay figure into the bushed. It exploded on impact, startling the Akatsuki.

"Kisame! Zetsu! Are you two alright?" Konan gasped, landing after finally catching up to them.

"W-Who are you people, un!" Deidara exclaimed, starting to wade back to the shore where Sasori promptly made sure to cover her.

"They are here to bring us back to their city." Sasori explained, "To join them."

"Why should we?" She huffed.

"We don't have many villagers. Only a doctor, a farmer, and someone to tend to the river and build. We recently dug up too much clay but have no artists to make use of it so we may trade." Konan explained, "Our village is a peaceful one for now but we hope someday to create an empire. Starting with the villages which have wronged our family." She glanced to Kisame and Zetsu, "For that is what we are; a family."

"'Family'?" Deidara tilted her head then turned to Sasori, "Sasori-danna... they mentioned a doctor and farmer. We'll be able to eat properly, un."

"I can feed you just fine on my own." Sasori protested.

"But you can't feed yourself and what you give me is barely enough for..." Deidara broke off, remembering the others, "A proper doctor is exactly what I need, Sasori-danna, un."

"Very well. We shall go with them." Sasori sighed, giving in.

–

So the five people headed back to their village. Tobi was the first to greet them, running to Zetsu, pulling him into a hug. Tobi's call alerted the others and Kabuto, Orochimaru, and one of the six Pains went to greet the new artists. They set to work straight away, constructing pottery and other such things. Deidara was far more skilled with the clay than Sasori but at least Sasori did not try to break the finished result after it was made. He was put in charge of firing and decorating all that Deidara finished crafting. Their days consisted of work, eating, and sleeping until Deidara awoke one morning, in pain. Sasori had brought her to Orochimaru's and informed the doctor that she had been pregnant since they met.

Back in her home village, she had been raped and then tossed out, accused of being a slut. Sasori had found her, a mess, and nursed her to the best of his ability. He had been living alone in the mountains near the village since he was a teenager so it was easy enough. The only problem was, he had not found out about the infant until weeks after. After she had found out, she attempted to blow herself up using her art. She nearly succeeded except Sasori managed to protect most of her body in the explosion. After that, he told her that he would take care of both her and her baby.

Unfortunately, once they visited Orochimaru... they were informed it was dead. In order for Deidara to have another shot at getting pregnant, Orochimaru and Kabuto began surgery immediately. Sasori waited outside the medical building, carving a block of wood to calm himself. Tobi then appeared besides him, looking at the door to the hut. She moved her hand to her mask then looked to Sasori.

"Do you care for that woman?" Sasori was surprised to hear a man's voice.

"Yes... I suppose I do."

"Then would you want to have her bare your children?"

"Wha—That's... I don't think she likes me in such a way. She didn't even want a child... It wasn't her choice..." Sasori stammered, carving the wood carelessly now.

"Very well... Tobi shall take her womb away then." It was still a man's voice.

"What? You can't do that!" He protested, grabbing Tobi's arm.

"See? You do want to father Deidara-senpai's kids!" Tobi's voice was normal now, "Tobi will heal her now so she can have a choice."

–

"S-Sasori-danna?" Deidara blinked, finally waking the morning after her surgery had been declared a success, "Why are you holding my hand, un?"

"I have no problem with the mouths, brat." Sasori sighed, sitting at her bedside, stroking the lips on the palm of her hand.

"Sasori-danna... will I be able to have a kid again, un?" Sasori blinked in slight surprise.

"If you want to." He shrugged.

"With you?" Deidara spoke softly.

"... Only if you want to..."

"I want to... I want you, danna."

–

Soon after, Zetsu and Tobi had their wedding ceremony before King Pain and Queen Konan and Sasori was engaged to Deidara. Life continued on as it had been, only Tobi announced she was expecting soon. Kisame again prodded Zetsu saying how soon it was. Tobi had been pregnant since she came to the village. She had become pregnant on that night she took Zetsu to find Orochimaru. Therefore, her child would have godly powers. This was, of course, only known to the parents and the gods.

We're getting ahead of ourselves...

–

Days after Tobi's announcement, Kisame was tending to a part of the river, alone when he saw something floating down the river. He soon realized it was a person and dived in to help them. He pulled them free with ease and rested the person on the bank. It was a beautiful woman. Kisame pinched himself, believing her to be false but alas, there she was. He pried open her mouth once he noticed she was not breathing and placed his lips on hers, blowing air past.

He continued to breathe air into her until the black-haired woman began to cough. He sighed in relief and helped prop her up, patting her back.

"T-Thank you..." She gasped.

"Don't mention it." He grinned his shark tooth grin.

"... Your skin... is peculiar."

"Uh... yeah... birth defect I suppose." He chuckled in embarrassment as he rubbed the back of his neck.

"I thought perhaps you had attempted to give me all your breath." She smiled faintly, "My name is Itachi."

"Mine's Kisame... you must be cold." He noted her shivering form, "Can you walk?"

"Of course." She rolled her eyes, getting to her feet and then stumbling into his waiting arms, "Somewhat..."

He laughed then took her into his home, passing one of the Pains on guard. The woman went straight to the bed and would have laid down had she not recalled she was soaked. A glance towards Kisame and he was already handing her some of his clothes, murmuring an apology for not having any that suited her. He bowed a bit then duck out of his house, allowing her privacy to change. Once allowed back in, his breath caught in his throat—even in his clothes the woman looked like an angel.

"You can have the bed tonight." He smiled, "You'll need it more than me."

"Hn..." She looked to the bed and a single piece of cloth which Kisame considered his blanket.

"Ah... sorry... This village doesn't have many people. We don't have anyone skilled with sewing clothes or other cloths." He apologized, "If you're cold... I could sleep besides you... If you wouldn't mind that of course." He started to blush and Itachi smiled, nodding her head once in a slow gesture as though it were a bow.  
–

The next morning, Tobi woke up the other Akatsuki, shouting about a newcomer. Orochimaru exited Sasori and Deidara's hut with them and Kabuto and followed him to Kisame's home where Zetsu waited, leaning on his hoe. He put a finger to his lips, a gesture to be quiet and then led them in. Kisame was lying besides a gorgeous yet somewhat pale woman with permanent worry lines on her face.

"That was fast, Kisame." Zetsu mocked, waking his friend by poking him with the handle of his hoe.

"Wha-? Oh!" He looked at the woman, still asleep at his side and began to blush ferociously, "No-no. You misunderstand. I fished her from the river and since I don't have any blankets..."

"Don't worry Kisame." Tobi cried, "Tobi likes to steal Zetsu's body heat at night too. Just like Sasori-san and Deidara-senpai."

"Hn...?" The sleeping beauty had awaken.

"Oh, you're awake, Itachi." Kisame greeted her.

"'Itachi'?" Orochimaru's jaw dropped, "Itachi Uchiha? The princess of the Uchihas?"

"Orochimaru..." The woman glared, clinging to Kisame, "What are you doing here?"

"I live here. What of you, princess?"

"I am no longer a princess..." She spat, "Our palace was under attack and I tried to flee with my brother... I jumped into the river..."

"Oh... I am sorry... wait..." Kabuto thought for a moment, "You'd still be a princess... Is there another reason?"

"... I... don't want to be royalty. I don't want to marry the prince of Konohagakure." She explained.

"You had an arranged marriage?" Konan had arrived, "You poor thing..."

"You don't have them here?" She cheered rather fast.

"No. Of course not, un." Deidara replied, hanging on Sasori's shoulder.

"May I please stay here?" She begged.

"Of course you can, Itachi." Kisame smiled, making the Uchiha's cheeks turn pink.

–

"It's getting colder..." Tobi frowned, rubbing her belly.

"Would you like to have our blanket, un?" Deidara offered.

"That would be helpful... but what about you, Deidara-senpai?"

"I'll be fine, un. I got Danna to keep me warm." She replied with a blissful sigh.

"I suppose sexual intercourse would be a good way of keeping oneself warm." Itachi murmured, sipping her water.

"Gah! You are so annoying, un." Deidara flushed.

"Does that mean Sasori-san is trying now?" Tobi asked, making Deidara become even more embarrassed to the point she smashed the clay project she was working on.

"That's none of your business, un."

"I don't see why not, Deidara." Konan giggled, "We're family and we want to know when to expect some little additions."

"She won't be able to tell if she's pregnant yet anyways. Why pester her...?" Itachi sighed.

"Konan." One of the Pains arrived, interrupting the womenfolk's discussion, "We have another addition you need to scout."

"Oh?" She stood, "What is their occupation?"

"Unknown... however we know he is at the Waterfall village, looking to exact revenge." He explained, "You may take two or three others with you." He then retreated, leaving the women alone.

"Zetsu needs to take care of his crops more carefully this time of year..." Tobi said.

"That's okay, Tobi. I wasn't planning on taking him from you this time." Konan nodded, "I might take Kisame, Sasori, and/or Deidara."

"Why Kisame? If you do not mind my asking." Itachi inquired curiously.

"He is very strong and yet kind. He also knows his way around, especially with any water involved." She answered.

"And the other two?" Deidara growled at how the ex-princess had spoken as though she was not sitting besides them.

"They are very good at fighting and surviving." She shrugged.

After that, Konan had told Deidara and Itachi to inform Kisame and Sasori and she would be waiting for them at the edge of the village. Kisame greeted Itachi once she reached him at the river with a warm smile.

"What's up, angel?" Itachi flushed at the nickname that Kisame seemed to develop for her soon after they had met.

"You will be going on a scout mission with Konan and the local artisans." She informed him.

"I see..." He frowned a bit, "Will you be okay here on your own?"

"Hn." She glared halfheartedly, "Kabuto will ensure Orochimaru keeps to himself."

Since she had arrived, Orochimaru had been flirting with the princess. It angered Kisame for a reason he did not fully know but the blue man believed it had to do with how he felt she was his because they still shared a bed. They had not been able to build a new home for her just yet and she did not want to leave his side. Itachi and many of the others already suspected Kisame's feelings.

"I'm not worried about him." He lied, averting his eyes.

Itachi sighed, and used her finger to bring his face back to her. They looked into each others' eyes, absentmindedly inching closer. Before their lips could touch, however, Deidara and Sasori had arrived. Itachi jerked away, hurrying back inside while Kisame simply stood there in a daze. He snapped out of it once Sasori roughly nudged him. He told him how he hated to wait and keep others waiting then they hurried to find Konan.

–

After awhile, they finally arrived at their destination. Takigakure was a village with only two social classes. There were the rich, and there were the poor. Rarely did they intermingle. They had entered the village through the poor people's half. The richest (being the royalty) lived within the waterfall and the poor bordered the rich outside the waterfall. Konan and the other three passed many people, young and old, that were dressed poorly. They were eying the travelers, wondering their business or if they had any valuables.

Deidara was carrying some of the pottery her and her fiance had created in a medium sack. They would be trading the items for something like clothes or blankets. They were stopped at the border between the rich and poor by a heavily cloaked man. His green irises were surrounded by red, giving him a demonic appearance and his mouth covered by a cloth.

"Hand over your valuables." He growled.

"We have none." Konan replied calmly, "We are simply looking for someone known as Hidan."

"Hidan?" The man's eyes narrowed, "What business do you have with her?"

"You know her then?"

"Unfortunately." He sighed, "Follow me..."

They exchanged a weary glance and Deidara branched off with Sasori to sell their items. The man whom introduced himself as Kakuzu had rose a brow but allowed them to leave, leading Konan and Kisame to the waterfall. He slipped inside with ease as though he had done this often.

"Is she royalty?" Kisame inquired.

"Far from it." Kakuzu replied, leading them through a secret hall, "She... is a slave..."

"What kind of slave?" Konan wondered why he had said it the way he had.

"... One for the king's entertainment." He spat, "She gets on my nerves everytime I come here, telling me that she can escape on her own. The stupid bitch."

The Akatsuki were confused but did not have time to answer for Kakuzu had arrived at another door. He motioned for silence then eased the door open after peeking out of a hole. There was a large cushion in the room where three women rested. Two were asleep while the third was faking it, planning her escape when she heard the secret passage slide open. Only one person knew of it and she groaned, getting up from the cushion to greet Kakuzu.

"How many fucking times do I have to tell ya. I don't need saving?" She drawled, glaring at the large man.

"I'm not here for that. You have visitors." He growled, motioning to Konan and Kisame whom were waiting patiently in the tunnel.

"Tch. What the hell do you bitches want?"

"You are Hidan...?" Konan asked.

"No shit..." She rolled her magenta eyes, "You better make this quick. If either of these sluts wake up-"

"Yes sir, I shall fetch her now." A man's voice sounded from just outside the slaves chamber and Hidan cursed, pushing Kakuzu back to the passage, "Hidan! You have been summoned to the king's chambers. He wishes to test you out."

Inside the tunnel, Kakuzu tensed, eyes expressing anger. They heard Hidan's shaky reply then heard the door close. Before either Akatsuki could open their mouth, Kakuzu had hurried down another hallway. They pressed their ears to the hidden door, listening intently.

"Now then, Yugakure whore. Let's see if the rumors of you are true." A man's cold voice was heard, "Strip now."

"Fuck you." Hidan's retort earned a slap.

"Now, wench."

"What are we going to do?" Konan whispered, shaking slightly as she heard a cry of pain.

"... Hidan will be fine... she won't let that man do anything to her she doesn't want." Kakuzu replied yet his body was tensed in anger.

"Let me go, you fucking bastard pig!" Hidan's shouts were followed by crashing.

"Shit..." Kakuzu cursed, feeling the wall for a switch to open the passage.

"K-Kakuzu!" The woman cried just before he found the switch.

"You." The king hissed, turning away from his 'toy' to face the intruder.

"Nobody touches her but me." He growled in return, slamming him against the wall.

While Kakuzu choked the man, Konan and Kisame hurried to where Hidan was stripped on the bed, cheering Kakuzu on. She did not seem to mind her naked state at the moment and grinned when the king began to turn as blue as Kisame. Kakuzu dropped the corpse and rolled his shoulders. He turned to face Hidan.

"What was that about not needing to be saved, bitch?" He growled.

"Oh shut up you old ass fucking man." She snapped, "I was just about to sacrifice the bastard to Jashin-sama when you interrupted."

"Moronic woman and your imaginary god..." Kakuzu grumbled, throwing her his cloak to reveal his tan arms, covered in stitched.

"Jashin is real!" She spat, pulling on the cloak, "And you just say that because you're jealous that he's more important to me than you." She stuck her tongue out.

"Um... as much as I'd hate to interrupt this lovers' quarrel... the guards are coming." Kisame chuckled nervously.

"WE ARE NOT LOVERS!" They both snapped.

–

They hurried to the outskirts of town, using yet another secret passage. Konan then led them to the rendezvous place where their artists were waiting. Deidara greeted Hidan politely whom did not return the politeness, instead mocking her breasts. This earned Hidan a whack to the back of the head by Kakuzu.

"Don't mind her. At least you have some." He smirked.

"Bastard..." Hidan blushed, slapping his arm.

"You guys remind me of an old married couple..." Sasori mused.

"WE ARE NOT A COUPLE!"

"Uh-huh... sure... un." Deidara rolled her eyes, readjusting her pack, "We should get going now. Danna and I found some lovely blankets and clothes to bring back to Tobi."

–

At the village, Tobi was resting in the medical building with Kabuto watching over her. Zetsu entered a moment later with a bucket of water. He went to her side and began to stroke her hand lovingly. As she began going into labor, the others returned with Kakuzu and Hidan. While the men took the pair to the only available hut, Deidara and Konan went to help the birth. After the baby boy was born, cleaned, and named, they went to meet their other new villagers.

"Fuck you, I'm getting the bed!" Greeted them.

"Is something wrong, Hidan?" Konan asked.

"Yeah something's wrong. This bastard wants the bed." Hidan snapped, pointing to Kakuzu.

"Why do you two not simply share like Kisame and I?" Itachi suggested.

"He'll rape me in my sleep." She huffed.

"It's not rape if you like it, Hidan." Kakuzu retorted.

"S-Shut up! I was just..." Hidan turned red in embarrassment, unsure of what to shoot back.

"I was 'your best lay' if I recall correctly." The man's smirk grew.

"You were my fucking first." She scowled, "How else was I suppose to reply?"

"Um... we'll just... be going since it appears we've faded to the background..." Kisame chuckled, leading everyone away to leave the newcomers alone.

"Why didn't you tell me?" Kakuzu asked the woman.

"Well... when you came for your daily assassination attempt, I had just been brought in as his slave." She murmured, her previous fire put out, "If you hadn't have showed up, that slob of a king would have taken my virginity..."

"Why me? Why not a guard?" Kakuzu was now the one with a slight blush.

"Those stitches were fucking hot shit!" She replied.

"... Seriously, why?" He scoffed, rolling his eyes.

"I am serious. You look amazing, Kuzu." She huffed, "All those scars must have hurt like a bitch too."

"You really are a masochist..."

"Hey... when you killed the king..." Hidan seemed to recall something, "You said the strangest thing..."

"What do you mean?"

"'Nobody touches her but me.' That's what you said."

"Well... what about your calling my name?" He said suddenly, trying to distract her.

"Your name was the first that popped into my fucking head. Not to mention you were the only bastard that would come rushing to my rescue." She explained.

"So... you are in love with me then?"

"I wouldn't say it that way..."

"It's getting late." Kakuzu murmured from the bed, "Join me."

–

Kisame headed home at Itachi's side, glancing down at her every once and awhile. She did the same and, at their doorway, their eyes met. They both smiled, Kisame wide and Itachi's small yet with the same amount of feeling.

"Did you have fun whilst I was away, Itachi?" He asked, leading her in.

"Hn." She replied quietly.

He laughed at her response, heading for the bed. He glanced back at her to find she was untying the sash around her waist. He watched in confusion as she dropped her robe-like garment to reveal herself. She did not seem to notice nor mind Kisame witnessing her undress and then redress into one of his simple shirts. She turned to face him, her face expressing consideration.

"Kisame." She approached him, "Do you find me attractive?"

"Yeah... but what makes you ask?" Kisame was caught off guard by the odd question.

"Would you like to have me?" She tilted her head, studying his reaction.

"Well... yeah..." He wondered where this conversation would lead him.

"Very well." She closed her eyes for a moment then, "I will marry you if you can help me find my little brother."

* * *

Yay! I have finished the first chapter in which all the Akatsuki are brought together and 'mated'.

I must say, I was worried about putting up this gender-bending story. Do you think it was in character enough? I think I did better than some others but... xD

Anyways, I assure you there was a good reason for the gender-bending. It's so much easier to give them offspring this way than through MPreg potions or tricks.

POLL TO ANSWER ON MY PROFILE:

What kind of AU stories do you like reading most?

High School/School

Historical Fiction (Like _Civilization: Akatsuki_)

Fantasy (Dragons, Wizards, Vampires, Werewolves?)

Space (Aliens)

Original World(s)

Placing them in another Anime/Manga's world

Post School/College

Other?


	3. Gathering an Army

Deidara sighed, wiping her brow with a sleeve. She was not required to make another sculpture but she was feeling stressed. The Akatsuki had managed to build a building specially for crafting and sewing since Kakuzu had joined, adding to their muscle. He was also skilled in sewing which surprised everyone, including Hidan. She had just recently stopped making fun of him for it after he threatened to make her sleep elsewhere. He sat across the room from Deidara, fixing a hole in a blanket.

Just as Kakuzu finished, Tobi entered, Taiyou in her arms. Deidara's expression became one of longing as she gazed at the infant. Tobi noticed and offered her child so she could help Kakuzu fold the blanket. Deidara sighed, stroking the child's cheek while the other two headed outside. She followed them to Zetsu's home. The blanket was made for the family since the cold season was approaching. The farmer was currently tending to his crops in the field. Sasori and Kisame were helping since Zetsu's farmland had increased size. The whole village was growing bigger, it seemed. Yet the population

remained exactly eleven when excluding their angel and gods.

In the center of the town, the other villagers gathered. Konan had summoned all of them to discuss population. While waiting for the others, Hidan and Itachi started a discussion of their own.

"Hidan-chan... do you plan on marrying Kakuzu-san any time soon?"

"Why the fuck would I do that?" Hidan scoffed.

"You two are a couple, are you not?" Itachi quirked a brow.

"Why is everyone thinking that?" She whined.

"You two share the same bed-"

"So do you and shark boy." She retorted.

"We plan on getting married."

"What? When?" Hidan's jaw dropped.

"Whenever I find my brother..."

"You have a brother?" Itachi nodded.

"Do you have any relatives?"

"Nah. Killed when our village was conquered by the Mist. Those that weren't offed were made into slaves like myself." She smirked.

"You don't seem too upset about it."

"I'm not. Fuckers were cowards." She shrugged.

"Hidan, how many times do I have to tell you to curb that street rat tongue?" Kakuzu and the others had arrived.

"Yeah. Itachi grew up surrounded by royalty, un." Deidara sniffed distastefully. "She can't handle a _woman's_ tongue."

"Itachi is a woman." Kisame defended.

"Nah, this bitch is a _lady. _Completely different." Hidan smirked.

"And you're neither, Hidan. You're a bitch." Kakuzu sneered.

"Fuck you!" She snapped.

"Later, whore." He retorted, almost playfully.

"Tobi doesn't think this language is appropriate for Taiyou..." Tobi offered quietly, the infant in her arms.

"Excuse me... are you going to let me speak or continue fighting?" Konan drawled, bringing silence upon the villagers. "Pain has brought to attention that we are lacking in numbers. We need more support should we come under attack."

"And what do you advise we do about it?" Hidan huffed.

"I know of some that might be willing to join us but we'll need money." Kakuzu mused.

"Tch. You and your fucking greed..." Hidan grumbled. "Last time I checked, it was money, or lack thereof, that brought the destruction of my home village."

"I thought the Mist-"

"Nah, they only finalized it." Hidan interrupted her blonde 'friend'. "Money makes you a bigger target and breeds mistrust."

"Bullshit. You just haven't seen it used properly." Kakuzu scoffed.

"Both of you have a point." Itachi cut in quietly. "It was money and mistrust because of the money that brought about my clan's slaughter." She paused, "However... if we could bring in people willing to fight for it... and keep them at a distance from us should they decide to take it or revolt..."

"I see where you're going." Kakuzu nodded. "That should work and I could keep them in line. Not to mention, we have Pain. It's amazing what one will do for their almighty _god_." He glanced at Hidan.

"Hey! If I don't pray, I die." She snapped, taking it as an insult.

"See? Fear does wonders." Kakuzu smirked.

"Yes... Then it is decided. We must get money and strong, trustworthy soldiers." Konan explained. "Kakuzu, you shall be in charge of handling that. Kisame and Itachi could perhaps see if there is a way to recover the Uchiha's riches."

"If they have not yet discovered the hiding place, then I suppose we could try." Itachi nodded.

"Sasori, will you be able to create weapons and armor?" Konan inquired.

"Yes... in a month's time I should have some ready."

"Very well. You have that long to prepare, Kakuzu, Kisame... Itachi." She then turned, heading back for the temple.

Zetsu and Tobi returned home while Orochimaru pulled Deidara away for her check up. Sasori and the blonde was still trying to have a child yet for some reason, it was not happening. Hidan yawned boredly then also headed for home. This left Kakuzu with Kisame and Itachi.

"Kakuzu, do you plan on taking her with?" Itachi inquired, seeing that the large, tan man was watching Hidan leave.

"Yes. Despite her looks, she's pretty strong in battle..." He mused.

"It sounds like you've fought her yourself." Kisame snickered.

"... How do you think I got this scar?" He held up his shirt, point to a long, jagged cut going from his shoulder to his hip.

"Damn." Kisame whistled, eying the scar. "Remind me not to piss her off..."

–

Sasori sighed, leading his fiancee to their bed. Their attempts have still gone without result. He could tell it was stressing Deidara out. She slumped into the bed, her expression blank. Hesitating, he slipped under the blanket, pulling it over her in the process. He had a feeling she did not want to try this night.

"Sasori, what if I can't have another kid...hm?" Deidara whispered after awhile.

"Deidara... I'm sure it's my fault, don't blame yourself. If it really comes down to it... I'll let you lie with another man so you may have a child." He replied, playing with her hair.

"I would never, danna." She protested, turning to face him. "I'm sure we're just not... trying hard enough, un."

"Perhaps..." He whispered; '_We've done nothing but try, brat._'

"Maybe if we take a break, un?" She offered.

"If you want to." Sasori shrugged, holding her close.

–

The next morning, Orochimaru woke up, the bed cold. Frowning, he looked around for Kabuto. The woman was not inside. He got up from their bed and pulled on his clothes. He jumped when he saw Sasori waiting for him. He sighed, guessing what the artist wanted. He gave him a scroll on which a plant was drawn.

"This is a fertility plant found a little ways down the river. In the delta." Orochimaru explained.

"Thank you, old friend." Sasori sighed. "I will be sure to gather some herbs as well."

"I suppose there is no reason to tell you to be safe." Orochimaru smiled slightly.

"I don't know if I should go just yet though... It's a few days travel and I'd like to have my wedding before having to leave her side for long." He explained.

"Of course." He paused. "Have you seen Kabuto?"

"She said she had to speak with Hidan about something." He shrugged.

Orochimaru nodded and returned to his room. Sasori headed out to where Kakuzu and Hidan resided, spotting the women but no sign of Kakuzu. He assumed he was helping Kisame or Zetsu and entered, listening to their hushed voices carefully.

"I threw up this morning... I heard from Deidara that it's a symptom..." Hidan whispered.

"Now, now, Hidan. Don't jump to conclusions. It's probably too early to tell..." Kabuto soothed her, setting her back down on the bed. "You could just be sick."

"But what will I tell him if I am—What are you doing here, Sasori?" Hidan snapped, noticing his snooping.

"I just wanted to tell Kabuto that Orochimaru was looking for her." He explained, heading back outside.

"Well you told her now piss off." She shouted.

"I'm going, I'm going. Yeesh." Sasori rolled his eyes and went to the artist stand. "So even she might be having a kid... Deidara's not going to like that one bit..."

–

A week passed and Sasori was waiting for the marriage ceremony to begin. He could not wait to see Deidara and be joined with her for good. They met and walked past their friends, hands entwined, up to where Konan and Pain awaited within the temple. A piece of cut fabric was tied around their wrists and they were married.

In the crowd, Tobi was quieting her child, smiling at the newlyweds. Zetsu looked bored, waiting to return to his crop. Besides them, Kakuzu and Hidan were both sulking, impatient for the love-fest to end so they could go home and Kakuzu could try once more to get Hidan into his bed. For awhile, the woman had been sleeping on the floor, stubbornly refusing Kakuzu's advances. This just made the man more intolerable for the other villagers.

When the ceremony finally finished, Sasori took Deidara to their home and informed him that he had to go to the delta. He promised the blonde that he would return with a befitting present and then some. He kissed her passionately then joined Kabuto at the river. Kisame was waiting with a raft of sorts. He would be leading them down the Ame River to the fertile delta where Sasori's goal grew.

–

Two days passed and Deidara had made many clay figures and dishes, with some help from Hidan. They were painting the last one when Sasori arrived, hurriedly whisking his wife to their home. He had brewed the fertility plant in some tea and offered her the cup. They toasted and drank quickly; Deidara could not wait for her present.

–

Soon, the end of the month arrived and Kakuzu was preparing to leave for the following morning. Hidan noticed this and frowned, placing a hand on her smooth belly. Kakuzu did not notice her standing in the room until he had finished and she crawled into bed. He looked eager but then he noticed a serious expression on her—something uncommon for the feisty zealot.

"Kakuzu... I don't feel too well." She whispered as he lay down beside her.

"Hmph. You've told me this excuse every night. Why are you in the bed?"

"Don't you want me in your bed?" She replied quietly.

"Well... yes..." He frowned in confusion.

"Can I not just sleep in the bed, for once? Or are you just using me to please yourself?"

"Is that a trick question?" He smirked, earning a lighthearted smack. "Fine. You can sleep. I'll have my way tomorrow night..."

'_Bastard doesn't get it.._.' She sighed, burrowing her face in his chest.

–

The next morning, Kakuzu woke up early. He glanced down at Hidan, her face contorted in pain. He frowned and kissed her forehead before getting out of bed. He threw an extra blanket on her, thinking she was cold and then changed his clothes. He grabbed the bag he had packed the previous night and slung it over his shoulder. He glanced back one last time and went to wake up Kisame. He would return for Hidan later.

He arrived at the fisherman's hut, pausing as he realized he had walked in on a tender moment. Kisame was holding Itachi, letting her cry into his shoulder. Kakuzu was confused but remained silent. He waited until Itachi had pulled away from Kisame, wiping her eyes. She stood and went to grab some clothes. Kakuzu decided to get Kisame's attention then.

"Hey. When'd you get here?" He smiled falsely.

"What's up with her?" He asked quietly, motioning to the former princess.

"She worried about returning home." He replied with a shrug. "Where's Hidan?"

"I'm letting her sleep in. She's been acting funny the past few days." He grumbled.

"Just because she does not want to have intercourse does not mean she is acting 'funny'. It just means she is losing interest in you or is simply tired of being taken advantage of." Itachi sniffed, glowering at Kakuzu.

"Where the hell did that come from?" Kakuzu scoffed.

"We'll go see if Sasori has those weapons for us, Itachi. How about you finish here and then go get Hidan?" Kisame urged, pushing Kakuzu out. "We'll meet you two there."

"Alright, Kisame-san." She nodded and went back to packing.

They went to the artists' home, waiting for one of them to wake up. After Kakuzu knocked on his door, Sasori arrived. He blinked a few times, still waking up and then stumbled back inside. He returned with a few blades and explained that he had poisons packed as well for their use. Symptoms written on a scroll along with an antidote. He followed them back to Kakuzu's home, pausing when he heard retching.

"Are you okay, Hidan?" Itachi's voice brought the males inside where Hidan was leaning over a bucket.

"Does it look like I'm okay, bitch?" She gagged. "Get me some fucking water."

"I'll go get Kabuto." She fretted.

"No!" Hidan pulled away from the bucket but she had already brushed past the men to get to the medical hut. "Damnit... I just need some water..."

"I'm sorry, Hidan... I didn't think sleeping on the floor would get you this sick." Kakuzu frowned, grabbing a nearby bucket of water for her.

"Tch, it's cold on the floor, bastard." She sniffed, cupping her hands to wash the vile taste from her mouth.

"You made her sleep on the floor?" Sasori scowled. "Idiot."

"Oi, she insisted on it..." He huffed.

"Did not. You only let me in bed while I was sleeping with you." She grumbled.

"Ah... Itachi told me you had thrown up, Hidan. Do you doubt my suspicions now?" Kabuto had arrived, a smirk on her face.

"Fuck you, slut." She snapped moodily.

"Well... you're going to need to rest so I can keep an eye on you." Kabuto still sounded smug but Hidan did not argue.

"What's wrong with her?" Kakuzu demanded.

"Nothing. Just go. I'll still be here when you get back. Not that you care." Hidan grumbled, allowing Kabuto to lead her back to the bed. "At least I'll get to sleep on the fucking bed for once." She sighed in bliss.

"Tch. Damn bitch..." Kakuzu rolled his eyes and left his home. "Come on, Kisame, Itachi."

"Are you sure you can just leave her like that?" Itachi voiced Kisame's concern.

"She'll be fine." He shrugged. "She claims to be immortal thanks to her god." He explained. "Besides, it's not like we love each other."

–

Kisame led Itachi and Kakuzu to Konoha by the river, stopping twice a day to get fish. It took them two days to reach the village which blocked out intruders with a large wall. Kakuzu scoffed at the high 'fence'; his village had a low stone wall but it kept the poor out of the rich part of town. Clearly, Konoha did not have the same hierarchy system as his home village.

"How will we sneak in?" Kisame mused.

"The Uchihas have a secret entrance..." Itachi explained, heading for deeper forest.

Kisame and Kakuzu exchanged a look but fell in behind her. She stopped at a section of fence that had an emblem carved on it. She explained that it was the Uchiha crest and pried the wooden slats apart. She slipped in but had to have Kakuzu make it wider in order to get the much larger men in. Kisame then followed her to the large house looming before them, leaving their stitched comrade to guard the fence. Itachi paused at the door, glancing at Kisame uncertainly.

"It's awfully quiet..." He murmured.

"What do you expect?" She sighed, leading him in. "Everyone's been slaughtered."

"No thanks to you." A male growled, startling the couple.

A boy closely resembling Itachi appeared from the shadows, arms crossed and a frown on his face. Itachi stepped closer to Kisame's side and greeted the boy formally. It was his brother, no doubt in Kisame's mind.

"Sasuke... you have grown..." Itachi smiled slightly.

"It's been years, sister." He scowled.

"'Years'?" Kisame echoed in confusion and looked to his bed-mate for an answer. "I thought..."

"... I ran away much sooner than I told you. I apologize for the lie." Itachi dipped his head.

"I see..." He frowned but then grinned again. "You usually have your reasons. You're a smart girl."

"Not now, Kisame." She blushed, looking away.

"So this is why you left? To shack up with some freak?" Sasuke scoffed, earning a glare from his sister.

"Watch your tongue, Sasuke." She snapped. "He is not a freak in the least."

"Is the sex really that good?" He retorted; Kisame felt his skin boil.

"Listen, you little punk," He grabbed the boy by his shirt, slamming him against the wall. "I don't care what you say about me but Itachi is not that kinda girl. If you say anything like that about her again, I'll gut you like a fish."

"Kisame, it's alright. He is just a child that does not know better." Itachi spoke softly, grabbing his arm. "Sasuke, I am very sorry for what I did to the family and I pray that you were not burdened by it..." She looked her brother in his eyes.

"... You should control your pet shark." He replied, earning a slap across the cheek from his sister.

"Itachi... are you sure you want him to come with us?" Kisame whispered.

"Why would I?"

"Why would you not?" She returned. "You know those of Konoha fear you for your lineage."

"... I don't see fear in their eyes when they look at me." He frowned.

"Brother, please... I miss you..." She whispered. "Our family was going to start a war with Konoha."

"... You're lying." Sasuke blinked.

"I am not. Konoha's king ordered I marry his son so our family would have no reason to overthrow him." She explained.

"Why didn't you?"

"How would you feel if you were told, at sixteen, you had to marry some one you do not love?" She shouted. "That your life is over because it's not yours to control?"

"... It was a respo-"

"Don't give me that 'it's your responsibility' bullshit father drilled me with." She cried. "You don't understand anything. I left, I tried to take you with me. Father and mother did not care for you like I did." She slumped in exhaustion. "Please, give me a chance to show you... what a family should be like..."

Sasuke stood there, pondering for a moment. It was a bit much for him to take in. His sister had always gotten the attention from their parents. Yet she had given him the love they failed to share. He watched Kisame hold her, smoothing her hair and whispering words of comfort. He had been abandoned for years now. He had only one person in his life in Konoha and she was going to be killed. That is when he realized Kisame's size and smiled.

"I'll go with you." He said, "On one condition."

"Anything." Itachi smiled.

"Help me break my friend out of jail." He grinned and Itachi's face fell.

"That's suicide..." Itachi frowned.

"Please, sister? I'm sure the behemoth could do it." Sasuke pleaded.

"Don't call him names." Itachi huffed, "If your friend means that much to you, then we will."

Itachi and Kisame led Sasuke back to where Kakuzu was waiting. The little Uchiha was shocked to find the man was also large, and covered in stitches. Kisame informed him of the situation and the man frowned. However he agreed to help. Itachi and Sasuke were ordered to stay put and wait while Kakuzu and Kisame went to retrieve 'Naruto'. They followed the map instructions Sasuke had given them to the prison and sneaked past the guards.

A blonde was sitting in a grimy corner, crying silently. It was the only girl in the place so Kisame began to look for a way to free her. Kakuzu grunted and began to pace the prison, looking in the cell. He saw a few potential soldiers but decided to keep quiet and wait until he was back in Takigakure. He returned to Kisame's side and punched the poorly made cell entrance. Naruto jumped in fear. Kisame helped her to her feet and told her they were here to rescue her.

The girl nodded and followed them to the forest where Sasuke and Itachi were waiting. The raven haired boy hurried to embrace the blonde. She continued to sniffle into his shoulder and he provided comfort. Once she had finally stopped, Kakuzu urged them on to his old village. Not before telling Itachi and Sasuke to retrieve anything valuable they had left. They arrived at the village in two days. Kakuzu covered his head with his hood and led them to his old house.

"Stay here, I'm going to gather some of my 'friends'." He dipped his head and then left.

Slowly, people began to arrive at the house, saying they had been sent by Kakuzu. They were pretty strong looking but clearly poor. After a few more, they stopped coming. A few hours passed and the Akatsuki began to worry. Itachi approached the last addition and asked where he had seen Kakuzu last.

"He said he was heading over the wall." He shrugged. "I heard he single handedly took down the king too."

"Probably revenge after they threw him in jail for failing that impossible assassination attempt." Another muttered.

"Heh. At least he succeeded the revenge assassination." The first one laughed.

"Kisame-"

"I'll go check it out." Sasuke interrupted his sister.

–

"Hidan, un!" Deidara tackled her friend, laughing happily. A week had passed since Kakuzu and the others had left. "Guess what, un."

"You're pregnant?" Hidan guessed with a sigh.  
"Yep, you jealous, un?" She smiled.

"Far from it." She grunted.

"Deidara-senpai, Hidan-chan!" Tobi had bounded into the craft center, "They're back!"

The two women jumped to their feet and followed Tobi to where a fairly large group of men were gathered. Hidan stood on his toes, looking for his housemate. He saw Kisame push his way through the crowd with Itachi and two other people on his heels.

"Where's Kakuzu at?" She frowned.

"Well... we're not sure..." Itachi fidgeted.

"He's in prison." Kisame whispered. "Or at least that's what we hope."

"What the fuck are you talking about?" Hidan snapped.

"He was taken by Takigakure. Pretty sure he's on death row." A man explained grimly.

"Ginji, you bastard!" Hidan slammed her fist into his face, making him stagger back. "You sold him out, didn't you?"

"No. I just didn't help him when he got caught." He returned, flinching as Hidan raised her fist again. "I didn't think he'd be captured so easily, ma'am."

"Fucking... ow..." Hidan winced, holding her stomach.

"Calm down. It's dangerous to become stressed in your state." Kabuto appeared at her side.

"Fuck... I'm gonna kill that bastard when he gets back."

"If." Ginji coughed, earning a glare.

"Why didn't you free him, un?" Deidara scowled at the Uchiha.

"Well..." Itachi glanced at Kisame.

"He was under heavy security." He mumbled.

"At least you tried." Kabuto sighed, looking to Hidan whose expression was blank.

–

Kakuzu sighed, trying to see through the darkness. He knew he was in Takigakure's prison again. He glared at his bound hands and feet. They had learned their lesson from his last imprisonment. He would not be able to free himself as easily as last time. He grunted and flopped against the wall. He hoped Hidan would be fine without him. He scowled at his worry; of course she would be fine, why should he care any way?

Of course, the woman was ill when he left. He was so busy in thoughts of her that he never saw them coming.

–

"Hidan must love Kakuzu after all, un." Deidara smiled to her husband, serving his meal.

"Why?" The redhead had not been out of the house, making his puppets so he was not informed of their missing villager.

"Well, she's really shaken up right now, un." She continued.

"Over what?"

"Over the fact Kakuzu was thrown in jail."

"He was what?" Sasori's eyes widened. "In Takigakure?" A nod. "Hidan isn't shaken up over that 'cause she loves him. It's 'cause she's carrying his child."

"What?"

Sasori tried to stop his wife but she had already hurried out. She ran to her friend's empty house and saw her slouched over the table, head in her hands. Deidara approached, placing a hand on Hidan's shoulder.

"Hidan-chan?" She whispered.

"What do you want, Deidara?" She sighed.

"Why didn't you tell me you were pregnant, hm?"

"It's none of your Jashin-damned business, whore." She snapped.

"But Hidan, without Kakuzu... you need a man to support you, un." She frowned.

"I don't need nobody." She hissed.

"Come on, you haven't even eaten yet, un. You can eat with danna and me." She urged her to come with her.

Hidan scowled but allowed Deidara to lead her to her home. Sasori quirked a brow at his wife's actions but continued to eat. Deidara placed a bowl of soup in front of Hidan. She only stared at it.

"Honey-"

"Don't call me that." She snapped.

"You need to eat, for the baby, un." She explained. "Kakuzu wouldn't like to come back to find he lost his child."

"He doesn't even know, nor care, about it." She scoffed.

"How do you know he doesn't care. He will find out regardless, because I am going to tell him, un."

"Bitch, mind your own business."

"No. Now eat or I'll make you eat."

–

After two months, the villagers Kakuzu drafted had homes just outside the main village. Yet of him there is still no sign. Until, late one night, a group of men arrived at the border. Kisame and Sasori went to confront them. They were more men, sent by Kakuzu. They informed them that Kakuzu had escaped and was making his way home but had to stop at a village for 'business' reasons.

"That fucking bastard! How much longer is he going to make me wait?" Hidan complained to Naruto and Deidara once they had been informed.

"I hope it's not much longer." Naruto huffed, grumbling as she washed Sasuke's clothes. "You're getting on my nerves-ttebayo."

"It's the pregnancy. You learn to deal, un." Deidara sighed yet agreed with the other blonde.

"Fuck you, blondie." Hidan grouched, nibbling more on a fruit Ginji had given her. "I'm tired, Ginji."

Since Kakuzu had been taken, Ginji had become somewhat of Hidan's servant. He claimed that it was his way of repaying Kakuzu for saving his life. The others were convinced that he really just wanted Kakuzu's lover. Two days after the newcomers arrived, Kakuzu was heading for his hut, ignoring the greetings of his fellow villagers. He opened the door and smiled when he saw Hidan sleeping peacefully.

"Hidan..." He whispered, nudging her shoulder. "I'm back."

"Ginji, that's not funny." She mumbled, rolling her head to look up at the person that disturbed her.

"'Ginji'?" He echoed with a growl. "Don't tell me you've been sleeping around, whore."

"Kakuzu?" Her magenta eyes shot open and she immediately slapped him across the face. "You fucking bastard! Don't you dare call me a whore." She screeched, "I have been stuck here for months, alone, listening to the others bitch and complain about the painful condition you put me in!"

"You were in pain?" Kakuzu frowned.

"You would be too if your baby's daddy left you!" She huffed, crossing her arms over her somewhat swollen belly.

"Wait... what?" He gaped.

"I said I'm pregnant with your child, dumbfuck."

"Wha—when?" He stuttered, grabbing her hands in his. "How much longer?"

"I dunno. Kabuto says six or so..." She frowned, her head down.

"I see... you're sure it's mine?" His question earned a cold glare.

"You're the only man I've ever slept with. Of course it's yours, bastard."

"Just checking..." He murmured. "So what are we gonna do?"

"Wait for it to be born and raise it together, duh." She scoffed.

"You want it?" Yet another glare. "Does this mean you love me?"

"... I don't have a choice." She shrugged.

"Of course you do." He sighed, pulling her into a kiss. "Because I love you."

"Really?"

"You seem shocked..." He smiled, "I couldn't stop thinking about you while I was gone..."

"I love you too, Kakuzu!" She cried, tackling him onto the bed.

They had a feeling the village was going to be just fine. Kisame and Itachi announced their marriage plans. Sasori and Deidara had a kid. People were happy and they now have an army...

* * *

Thanks go to: _Akatsukifan14, garraraccoonlover, Teamjacob46, kiotsukatanna, Blood Drenched Scorpion, _and_ Kumajiro-is-Edible._

This isn't really over for sure. But this is a nice ending. Extra chapters may be added if I get an idea but don't count on it. You are welcome to propose ideas of new challenges for them to face in their new civilization. So... yeah... this is the end, not end... xD

*returns to practicing oneshots* I can't wait til I can go back to my Valentine's Day challenge...


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